The below excerpts appeared in the Salt Lake Tribune. They were taken from real court records.
Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?
Q: What happened then?
A: He told me, he says, "I have to kill you because you can identify me."
Q: Did he kill you?
Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
Were you alone or by yourself?
Q: I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?
A: That's me.
Q: Were you present when that picture was taken?
Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?
Q: You say that the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?
Q: Now then, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?Q: Do you know how far pregnant you are now?
A: I'll be three months on March 12th.
Q: Apparently then, the date of conception was around January 12th?
A: Yes.
Q: What were you doing at that time?
Do you have any children or anything of that kind?
Was that the same nose you broke as a child?
Stupid questions indeed!
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I've seen those before...they're even funnier the second time around!
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These were very good. Are we allowed to laugh or will the gavel come down on us?
ReplyDeleteI've seen these all over grouped with others. Pretty funny, and I guess you just have to assume they were working with some pretty serious sleep deprivation!
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Lara
Some of those sound like they ought to be rhetorical questions, but somehow I doubt they are...
ReplyDeleteI like the "did he kill you?" depo question. How like real life...
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LMAO...great list...hard to believe!! Happy TT.
ReplyDeleteYep, these sound about right. I've spent a lot of time in court over the years and these sound about right. Have a great TT. :)
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Oh my God! :o)
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