Q: When lawyers die, why don't vultures them?
A: Even a vulture has taste.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 10?
A: A lawyer.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an I.Q. of 50?
A: Your honor.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus?
A: Never enough.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: How many can you afford?
Q: Did you hear about the new microwave lawyer?
A: You spend eight minutes in his office and get billed as if you'd been there eight hours.
Q: What's the difference between a law firm and a circus?
A: At a circus, the clowns don't charge the public by the hour.
Q: Did you hear about the lawyer hurt in an accident?
A: An ambulance stopped suddenly.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark.
Q: What do lawyers do after they die?
A: They lie still.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?
A: Lawyers accumulate frequent flyer points.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
Q: What's the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon?
A: The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes.
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11 comments:
lol ~ Great list!
Funny list! Happy TT!
sobeit
Juan Valdez names his donkey after you
*You get a speeding ticket even when you're parked
*You grind your coffee beans in your mouth
*You sleep with your eyes open
*You have to watch videos in fast-forward
*You lick your coffee pot clean
*Your eyes stay open when you sneeze
*The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse
*You can type sixty words a minute with your feet
*You can jump-start your car without cables
*Your only sources of nutrition comes from "Sweet & Low"
*You don't sweat, you percolate
oops....guess my copy and paste went crazy....sorry ...might want to delete that one!!! :)
sobeit
http://sobeit89.squarespace.com
What a funny list! I particularly like the IQ thing. The lawyer's I know think they are so smart - and they are, but really, they aren't as smart as any employee of, say, JPL.... :)
Happy TT.
My TT is up: Thirteen people who inspired me in 2007.
I'll have to send these to my stepdad. He used to be a lawyer.
Happy TT
http://moondancerdrake.livejournal.com
Wonder if I should send that to my lawyer... no, it would be better to send it to the x's...... it might help him find a sense of humor.
Thanks for the laugh!
Dee
http://pavinganewroad.wordpress.com/
I should send those to my father...a lawyer. LOL! How funny!
My Thursday Thirteen is up too! :)
Lol ! very funny !!
Happy Thursday 13. The moving bus one was truly evil. :)
Funny. I liked the one about after they die they lie still. It took me a minute...
Happy TT!
TM
http://thoughtsfrommillermanor.blogspot.com/2007/12/thursday-thirteen-12-ornery.html
Very funny jokes!
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